Bollywood is a fantasy factory. Its products do not aim to explain the world around us where as art has always been the best arm to explain the life of human being.

MY COMPLAINTS FROM MEDIA

The media has two main aspects, as a part of what is known as information industry and as a factor in the formulation of opinion. In both respects, it has to act with responsibility to be effective or reliable. The Press is still the main medium of mass communication. Besides its educative role, it can help in exposing the weaknesses of the democratic system and point out how these can be rectified. This two-way traffic enables the Press to maintain an important and strong link between the public and the system
But the face of electronic and print media is no longer inclined towards the work of making the readers and viewers sentient of the parameters of the incidents and developments transpiring across the globe. It has been metamorphosed into some corporate modus operandi of selling the products. It has been commercialised beyond its elastic limits. None of the channels available today is ready to project the gross of the occurrence, instead all it cares for is the total rating points.
Going by the standards, journalism is the discipline of gathering, writing and reporting news, and broadly it includes the process of editing and presenting the news articles which should be unencumbered by jargon. It is mesmerising indeed to see a good piece of work travelling to continents through various hands
Books are not only a piece of written material it is a wave that travels across the oceanic world of voracious and awaiting readers and formulates the opinion of a wide swathe with different cultural and political background. So it should be cent percent filtered truth rather than personal fictions and fantasies. But it is very unfortunate to accept that the people who scratch their living (active or passive)have failed to understand their responsibility as the shapers of the society, they are vulgarizing and brutalising the society instead of purifying and sanctifying it. A new mutation of iconoclasm has brought enlightenment to a standstill. These days too many channels are chasing too little news. So the crowd is no longer interested in what the news is instead they are much more interested in personal opinions People want to know about people who are writing not about what they are writing. The prime focus is no longer to act like a bridge between action and report, instead it has become a school of inattention where people listen to it without hearing which has exponentially increased the lack of trust with entanglement of rumours culminating to cynical ideologies and principles. Enlightenment has been a long forgotten story...
.

profound desire

"I want to be the change i want from the society"

pondered paradox:

"our culture is glorified by non-violence but our freedom was born in blood and our independence is soaked in it!!"

My FMORT

0:00
i am tagged by http://umangexuberance.blogspot.com/

Everything tells me that i am about to make a wrong decision,but making mistakes is just part of life.What does the world want of me??does it wants me to take no risks,go back to where i came from so that i can repent that i never had the courage to say yes to life.life brings realisation,realisation that opportunity only knocks once...and so i should grab whatever it has to offer!Everything here is an illusion and this applies to materialistic as well as non-materialistic things as well.Anything i thought was mine forever was lost and finally i have realised that nothing really belonged to me.And if there is nothing i can tag as mine then what is the point wasting time looking after them....so i want to live beacuse i am not going to live long!

AXIOM::A cup of tea!

i make very nice tea but i never use to make one good cup of tea ,for a nice tea it had to be more than one cup .No matter how hard i tried one cup tea always use to turn up into some tasteless liquid.And so i always use to ask myself why does this happen.today i found the answer ...it is because i think tea is all about being gregarious.It is a way to socialise and spend time with your kith and kins!You like tea not because of its taste but because of the quality time that you spend.and the faith you have is always reflected in your actions that's why i said i believe

But i make very good "a mug of coffee " sip and introspect ALONE!! :)

JAIPUR FOR ME!!

I was recentl in jaipur and few things touched me so very much that i decided to put them up here!!
http://picasaweb.google.com/abhsahay/JaipurForMe

DEDICATED TO MY IDOL :PRAMATH MALIK

"त्वमेव माता च पिता त्वमेव ,
त्वमेव बंधू च सखा त्वमेव,
त्वमेव विद्या च द्रविणं त्वमेव
त्वमेव सर्वं च मम देवो देव।"

For me you are the mother and the father,you are the friend and the relative,you are the wisdom and the courage,the endurance and the strength,the stability and the equilibrium.
you are everything that i wish you to be .....truly human enriched and bestowed with every earthy element,love, care, anger, desperation,ANNOYANCE and still so focused....i believe you are the "via media" for my god when he wants convey something or preach something.....whatever he has decided for me is so very evident from your words so please don't stop speaking to me!!

miracle child rises again!!

The miracle child has started to feel that love is not something one can boast but at the same time there is nothing to conceal.
And thus finally the miracle child is ready to express what he feels about love ... for a while we swap souls so that he can pen down his thoughts......
My aim to understand love......i know how alive i felt when i was in love and now i know everything howsoever interesting it may appear doesn't excite me.
All the relations are fading or maybe transforming into suffocating chains.I am not saying that i am not in love with her anymore but living is difficult these days
i have no one to share with and the one whom i want to is not available due to his share of responsibilities and duties.anyways...
her presence can be felt but not solidified.She is like a gush of stream that i want to gallop in one go,it rushes around me .....but never touches me!I believe she can see me,but if she can see me then why does she wants to make me feel miserable?Is she not aware of the ailment i am suffering from?Is she happy to see me crying?
All my going around days i use to think about love as some kind of voluntary enslavement,but now i have realised that freedom is only present where love exists.The person who gives himself wholly feels freest.
True experience of freedom is having the most important thing in the world without touching possessing or owing her....i say this maybe because she is away from this world...but i am not Landon carter with a "a walk to remember"....i am a normal human being trying to live when everything is on the brink of getting drowned!
If i want to be faithful to someone then first i need to be faithful to myself.If i wish to preserve my true love then first i should get the mediocre love out of my system.
Because love is not eager it is always patient and kind,it is never jealous selfish or revengeful.It is always ready to excuse and let you fly...and is love is HOPE!!

In last three months experience i learnt a new language...the language very well known to the world but spoken very less....SILENCE!!

passing thought:

All religion are in essence
the same:they preach the fatherhood of God and brotherhood of man !!

##brio-doctrine ##

"Those who want to live, let them fight, and those who do not want to fight in this world of eternal struggle do not deserve to live."

why am i abandoned???

exhaling agony!!

I hate myself for all what I did to myself....I punished my soul. I repent for all what I did ...today have nothing to express ......or maybe to many things are swirling in the ocean !!so I am confused where to start from...I am hollow but still i need to write ...i need to get away from all what I am observing and expressing...the biggest problem is i am suffocated but I don't know the reason behind it....these days i get irritated very easily on petty things that I would have had easily forgotten ...and this is becoming lethal to my character......a stranger resides in me these days.....when I introspect I find I have lost the essence of being abhishek sahay...... everything is so very unabhishek about me these days...i keep behaving the way i can annoy people the most ...I want to stay alone ...i want no one to ask me questions,...i want My space...I feel there is a cosmic conspiracy going on to intrude into my hidden soul......a touch to my mind or eyes use to easily touch my soul....but now a days no matter how hard one tries ...(and that includes myself.)....no matter whatever may be the effort i am unable to feel my soul...am i losing myself. i have become so mechanical....every morning i wake up thinking how to solve the mess around.....the harder i try the more entangled it gets.....again in the evening i give up thinking next morning will bring a bit of light and hope.....but alas the day is yet to come.....i am nostalgic these days....i want to go to my place ....away from gurgaon......in the mountains where i can be reborn...i want to wash away the muck in me with the cold water .......very very cold...in fact i tried it thousand times but i guess i am polluted so deeply that every layer of my soul is to be skinned and sliced ..... i miss my parents very much ....i hate myself for staying away from them.....i wish i could be with them... BUT ..i am living with a parent ......the pramath ...a faith that hates to talk to me....he is not bothered to share ….but why will one bother to …who am i…a small peck in front personality so oceanic ........in a nut shell. .it is not his fault ...he never told me that he is going to be an integral my part of my life or he is going to guide me either and thither........i assumed........why??? because i believe he is my idol.....he is the one who is to be mimicked......he is the one who will set all standards and goals for me...every bar i have to break!!but he too is a human and i understand that constraint ....he has his share of duties and responsibilities. When I try to do something with full heart he says I am an idiot and tend to over do things for him……I believe everything I have achieved here is because of him …I know I stand better than many in this college…and all because of one person here…..yeah him..a man who never showed me a path to be followed but always inspired me to make one for myself…. …but he also needs to understand that I am no eklavya…..who can learn things without even listening to a single lecture of his mentor !
I am a small kid standing on the crossroads of life waiting for my mentor to come and let me hold his fingers and follow him!!! AM I EXPECTING TOO MUCH?????

passing thought : organised people are too lazy to look for things.....!!

THOUGHT OF THE MIRACLE CHILD : I am trapped in a bubble.The people around me think that my life is vibrant as the bubble appears to be full of colours,but alas from inside it is hollow,filled with nothingness.I am eroding in suffocation and the world is celebrating!!

i saw the lonely sun drowning in the sky! (still from my farmhouse)

collosium

We often say that mom you won’t understand …forget it you won’t understand. But have you ever bothered to think that why cant she understand? She could understand your needs when you were few months old, unable to utter a single word. A single gesture could make her understand what you need.
It is actually not about not understanding it is about what you wish to do in order to make her understand.
Sometimes I just wonder when people say, love is so beautiful. Being in love makes you feel celestial. And the parents become a long forgotten story. I just sometimes wonder, how someone you have known for twenty months, be more important than one who has loved you for twenty years. Yes, love is beautiful indeed but only if you understand the silver lining of love and lust.

I feel life is all about your mother. Actually life is like a journey of a rocky island. First it is born from the mother sea like a baby from any life form. She is thrilled to give birth and splits her organs to make space for her child. It starts to rise from the mothers drapes. The mother is always protective and tries to hide its kid from the peculiarities of life. She sacrifices her personal calm and peace and from disturbances that can create enough waves within her to hide her kid so that the dangers can be avoided about which the child is unaware. Initially the kid is insecure and hides in the mother’s breast very easily.
But gradually it grows and stands towering rebelling and repelling its own creator, mother. It abuses and physically repels the mother. It tries to destroy the mother’s caring waves which she wants to bestow upon him. Yet she thinks it is a craving to explore new things around her and she forgives her child. And the kid unknowingly keeps hurting his mother.
And finally, a time comes when the kid joins another island. They join together and try to restrict mother. In fact they restrict their mother so that she can’t even put her hand on the body of her son. whenever she wants to send her loving waves to the island t wash the dirt off her son, the soon tries to repel it, breaks the hand and forces her to retreat. But a mother is like the epitome of affection she keeps trying and sometimes during high tides full of emotions showers herself on the high rocky island. The mothers thirst is satisfied for a while. You must have wondered why the sea is so calm after high tide. I hope now you know why.
But nature has got her own set of rules. It makes sure that with time the mother remains strong enough and the kid gradually erodes. It is hit and re hit by the waves of the sea and finally withered into small particles of sand that are lead back to the sea bed. But there are also sons that remain so gradual in their gradient that the mother easily can reach every point of his body and there forms the mountains like Himalayas……truly respecting its origin and deep routed enough..always remembering where he rose from..always respecting the mother’s affections.
So if you have a problem with your mother, the problem is within you.

epitome of identity crisis!!

1.Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it?


i have symmetrical scars just above my eyes,all thanks to my habit of picking up fights


2.What does your phone look like?


i had bought a sleek and slim l7i last year but it has been converted into a touchpad ...actlly the first three layers of its keypad has been peeled off....and it looks like an ugly gadget.


3.What is on the walls of your bedroom?

on the left wall there is a huge shelf for my novels!!to the right i have a poster proclaiming
"no bulshit in my room please"

4. What is your current desktop picture?

Ishani

5. Do you believe in gay marriage?

no!!

6. What do you want more than anything right now ??
CROSSROADS should be a grand hit.

7. What time were you born?
afer POKHRAN nuclear test 10:47

8. Are your parents still together?

yeah

9. Last person who made you cry?

pramath

.10. What is your favourite perfume/cologne??
no personal favourites


l1. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex?

glittery black and eyes should be watery and black

12. What are you listening to?

skidrow and iron maiden ...blood brothers

13. Do you get scared of the dark?

darkness in life is killing bt otherwise darkness is a support when i like to be true me...u don't need to wear faces!!

14. Do you like pain killers?
not the tablets but yeah i depend on lot of painkillers like music and journals i write....they heal!!

15. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
nope!! i have done that couple of times successfully but these days i don't want people around ......i am happy with my memories!

16. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?
chocolate brownie and vanila icecream topped with choco sauce

17. Who was the last person who made you mad?
pramath sometimes irritates a lot

18. Who was the last person who made you smile?
smiles faded long back!!

19. Is someone in love with you?
yeah a couple of them but unfortunately i have become a huge sponge...people try to send huge tides of emotions expecting me to send it baack but alas!!!.....and i am filled with a sense of guilt for that!

THE MIRACLE CHILD !!

There was boy in a very small town with very little facilities. The meekest of all, lean and thin ,ugly and introvert. He had poor friends to live with. He use to be scolded for his handwriting where as his dad had a very good handwriting. He could not study well and so was always hauled over the coals. As time passed his mom and dad realised that he is also shy and is always afraid to face the world. The sole rest to his slaughtered soul was his family. In a very large campus his father owned he use to feed his lunch to stray dogs and puppies. The child believed that a day will come when he will rise beyond all this pain and agony and the world will cherish and talk to him. His humiliated parents will be there to take pride of what their son has achieved. Inspired by a thought so untainted and divine he started with determination.

When he was in tenth standard destiny hit him harder. His father was shot by an assassin. By gods grace he managed to survive but unfortunately engulfed by acute paraplegia and was bed ridden. The person can’t walk or even talk properly and suffers enormous pain in thighs. The sixteen year old kid was shouldered by responsibilities and had to leave school for a year .when other kids use to go to school and listen to teachers, this boy use to sit next to his dad listen to the moans and cries. Others prepared for exams on their study table, this boy use to sit on wooden stool and attend to his father’s ailment and read books.
But the juvenile determination was no longer a sapling, it had routed like a tree। This time the lad aimed high. He dared to dream. The miracle happened and the child got better than those sitting in the study room. The juvenile determination grew with accelerating pace and stood firm. Hard work started to pay and he started to fetch excellent marks। With no guidance from teachers and studying in one of the modest schools he managed a good command over a couple of languages। But his parents were not there to admire him.

Full of enthusiasm the boy filed for the best school of his country. When he cleared all interviews and tests his parents explained the economical crunch and denied. The hopeful child begged for help from his relatives but like always was thrown away.He became a tutor and went to school. The child was a big lad now and his determination was stronger than before. The miracle returned back. This time the boy came up with flying colours and got admission in a decent college. Right from the admission to his survival in the big city he managed on his own. He saw other coming up with their parents to this new world and turned melancholy. He dreamt of his parents standing behind. The determination is still growing with an accelerating pace but a void has been created inside. Right now he has won three consecutive years prizes for best handwriting from Scottish society for calligraphy but his dad still don’t talk to him, the reason is different now, he is ill.
So where should he walk? What is his fault? Why has the destiny bestowed so much of darkness to his adjacent? I sometimes meet this kid. He lives very nearby some where close to my soul and always wants to ask “dad now will you talk to me?” can you answer him?
he is the miracle child!!

RATIONALE!!

I am an alien to this very lucrative world of blogs which has so much to offer. But my reason for being here is exuberance, exuberance herself, exuberance to write and to let my wild and unchannelised sentiments flow. There are times when i want to pen down my strong perceptions about certain things but i feel tactless about it or maybe i am scared. More than often I hear voices within me, voices producing different vibes, sometimes they energise me ,sometimes they tend to suck all my enthusiasm, sometimes they even provoke me for an action i should have taken on the spot and grip me with strong emotions say anger or joy something not extraordinary.
In fact I am not here to write about extraordinary things in an extraordinary way because I am not capable of, but I am going to try to write about ordinary things in a very ordinary way. Going back to what I wanted to convey, I want to express those voices through my pen, even though they seem to be volatile .I don’t know why am I doing this ,maybe because I have the intuition that this is going to give me immense pleasure and contentment. After a short while if I fail to continue I will erode because I will let my spirit decay. And for sure I can’t promise that I will keep writing forever. But if I don’t give it a try I might later regret for not giving it a try and let me soul be free for a while .I am not here to gang up and throw opinions on everything I feel like but I am here to express the inexplicable within me. So may I try and proceed??